"I mean the words in this title with every piece of my being.
On January 1st, 2019, I broke up with my long-term boyfriend, was in a depressive slump, completely stuck on where my life path was, and I knew I needed a change. The end of 2018 was difficult for me- I moved back home after living abroad, and the life I had built in Spain and the US felt like it was crumbling around me. Being newly single, I dove headfirst into my therapy sessions and started applying to jobs and graduate school but without the drive and vigor I'm generally known
for.
Then one day in February, I was reintroduced to triathlon.
I was a lifeguard at Lifetime Athletic at the time, since it allowed me a semi-flexible schedule and I could make money while working on other facets of my life. I'm also a lifelong swimmer- when I was ten years old, my mom signed my brother and I up for the local swim team to get us out of the house and we were hooked. So not only did working at Lifetime give me the benefits I mentioned before, but I got to spend a lot of time at one of my favorite places- the pool.
I had the morning shift for a while, and befriended the aquarobics instructor. I found out she and some of the people in the class were training for the indoor triathlon- I didn't know why at the time, but something in me awakened. The day of the indoor triathlon, I was sitting on the lifeguard chair watching the swim portion, and signed up for my first ever triathlon later that day. A childhood swim coach of mine was a triathlete, and I had been exposed to it through her, but otherwise I
was entering a world fairly outside my comfort zone.
Having this specific goal- swimming 300 yards in a lake, biking for 10 miles, and running a 5k- gave me something to do every week. I ended up leaving Lifetime before the triathlon for a full-time job, but I still had a bike or run to look forward to in the evening. I found my spirits slowly lifting, and more importantly, I found a new part of myself.
My first triathlon was an absolute blast. I didn't have the greatest performance- I struggled with each part of it from lack of technical preparation- but the atmosphere was so supportive and I found myself more energized than I had felt in months. I felt like the best version of myself. Of course, I signed up for my second triathlon later that day.
If you're reading this and you know me personally, you know that the second triathlon didn't happen for me.
July 6, 2019, was the day before my second triathlon. My parents own a rental property and I decided I would join them that morning to assist in cleaning up the place between rentals. I sat in the backseat of my dad's car for the majority of the trip, but asked my mom if we could switch seats because I was feeling carsick.
I don't think I've ever made a more unwittingly impactful decision in my life.
We were a few minutes early and the family at the property hadn't left yet, so we decided to take a brief loop around the block to kill some time. In the town we were in, pedestrians have the right of way at intersections, so we were stopped at an intersection with a stop sign waiting for a family to finish walking across the street. That's when I felt the slam.
My dad said he saw it coming- I certainly didn't. I felt my whole body jerk forward, and then slam back. Pain blasted from my head down my neck and back, and I felt dizzy and ill. I saw my dad get out of the car and start talking to a woman as my mom opened my door.
"I don't feel so good", I told her. She helped me out of the car and I sat down on the grass nearby, stunned.
The woman my dad was speaking to had been texting and driving and didn't see our car stopped at the stop sign. There was a massive dent in the back of my dad's car - the joke ended up being what took on more damage, me or the car. The answer was me.
I was put on a stretcher and taken to the local hospital, where I got X-Rays, a CAT scan, and was told I had gotten my third concussion- the triathlon the next day was a no-go. I was heartbroken- having already spent a year of my life recovering from two prior concussions, my biggest fear had been realized and I knew I had a long road ahead of me.
This time around, I was lucky- I still had triathlon. While I couldn't race, I had joined Facebook groups and started connecting with other women in the sport. I began my Instagram account documenting my recovery with the goal of using my story to amplify concussion awareness and education as I plotted out my big plan- to complete a full Ironman in 2022.
I'm thrilled to say that after a difficult, tumultuous road, I was cleared from my concussion on February 12, 2020. The world shut down about a month later due to the pandemic- I grieved once again losing several facets of my life from circumstances I couldn't control, including all my races for the year and a job in my field. Still, I had triathlon.
I wake up grateful every day that I have the capacity to train, and even more so to connect with people who love endurance, multisport, and the drive to find and push our limits. I'm still battling physical and mental health issues, but it doesn't make me less of a triathlete- in fact, I believe with every bit of my heart that triathlon saved my life- I wouldn't be who or where I am today without it."